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APH - How to Annoy AustriaHow to Annoy Austria
1. Hold his piano hostage. In order to get it back, he will have to listen to you playing Mozart and BUTCHERING IT!
2. Or by making him dress up like Lady GaGa.
3. After he gets his piano back, wait until he falls asleep and paint it pink. Afterwards, spraypaint "Prussia wuz here."
4. Send love letters to Prussia under his name.
5. Make him listen to Justin Bieber.
6. Make him listen to Hannah Montana.
7. Actually, just let him listen to pop music period!
8. When he does listen to it, tape his reaction and put it on YouTube.
9. Or give it to Prussia.
10. Tell him he's the worst piano player you've ever heard.
11. When it's his birthday, make him a delicious cake. When he is about to cut it open, take it away.
12. Or better yet, throw the cake in his face.
13. Follow him constantly. When he looks behind to see who it is, hide in a shrubbery.
14. Poke the mole on his face multiple times.
15. When he plays on his piano, tell him that something appears to be wro
APH - How to Annoy PrussiaHow to Annoy Prussia
1. Tell him that he is the least awesome person in the world.
2. Tell him that America's more awesome than him. Plus, he's the hero.
3. Tell him he's so lame that he's not even a country anymore.
4. Hang the Austrian flag in his room.
5. Plus, hang a giant picture of Austria that takes up his whole wall. Use super glue to make it stick.
6. Troll his blog.
7. Better yet, hack into his blog and turn it into a shrine for Austria.
8. If he tries to change it back, make sure he gets rick-rolled and/or a Trojan virus.
9. For Christmas, get him a frying pan.
10. Take Gilbird away and send him to a chicken farm.
11. For his birthday, give him a one-way plane ticket to Moscow.
12. Steal his framed picture of Old Fritz.
13. Throw a birthday/Christmas/New Year's/whatever party for him. Tell him that you're inviting everyone. Instead, make sure to only invite Russia.
14. Make him watch Eragon for a week.
15. Show him all the AustriaxPrussia yaoi on the Internet. Laugh a
Prussia: How to Be AwesomeHow to be Awesome, like Me!
Hey, guys! It's the awesome me! Sorry I couldn't post stuff up earlier, my computer caught a virus and West isn't letting me borrow his for some inane reason. Whatever.
You want to learn how to be awesome, right? 'Course you do! There's nothing better than being awesome! Unless, you're the most awesome person on the face of the planet but that's me, of course!
So, without further ado, here are five tips that I've come up with to help you losers become so awesome!
1. NEVER hang around with people!
Seriously? People suck. They'll only bring you down and try to steal your awesomeness! I guarantee that you will be much happier alone! Being with others should be avoided at all costs.
2. DON'T GET MARRIED!
Nooooooo! I don't care if you love this person or whatever! DO NOT MARRY THEM! You'll practically become their slave for life and they'll force you to do stupid things with them! Plus, this means that you'll have to SHARE
APH - The Facebook WarsAPH - The Facebook Wars
Elizabeta is celebrating Valentine's Day! Happy Valentine's Day, Roderich! <33 XOXOXOXOXO
Roderich likes this.
Roderich: Happy Valentine's Day!
Roderich: What are you doing here?
Elizabeta: Dammit! I thought I blocked you!
Elizabeta: GET OFF OR I'LL TELL LUDWIG!
Elizabeta has blocked Gilbert.
Gilbert has been banned from Facebook.
Roderich is getting ready for the March concert.
Elizabeta, Feliciano, and 3 others like this.
Elizabeta: Good luck, sweetie! I know you'll do well!
Roderich: Thank you!
Feliciano: I wanna go! How much are tickets?
Roderich: The prices start at 100.
Feliciano: Aw! I can't go!
Gil: I can take you! ^_^
Feliciano: Really? That'
APH - THE MANATEE PRINCESSThe Manatee Princess
Prussia was walking through an elegant meadow, laughing at the butterflies flitting around his head when he spied a quizzical little manatee lying under a tree.
Prussia skipped over to see the dear thing and was soggy to find that she was hurt! A soup had pierced her jolly little head and she whimpered cuddly with the pain.
"My beautiful little friend," Prussia said. "Let me help you!" He took out his Leatherman Multi-Purpose tool and pulled out the soup, as sexily as he could. The manatee cried out and Prussia's heart ached, like a cornered animal.. "You'll be all right," Prussia whispered. "I'll take care of you. I'll call you Hungary and you can live with me forever!"
Scooping Hungary up in his arms, Prussia carried her home and made a bed for her beside his own. For seven days and seven nights, Prussia nursed Hungary, cleaning her head and feeding her Algebra book-brand manatee chow.
On the eighth night, Hungary climbed into bed with Prussia. She burrowe
AN EPIC LOVE STORYOnce upon a time, Germany was walking through the woods, and he noticed the most curious thing on the forest floor. It was a stick, but not just any ordinary stick. It was a beautiful stick, the most beautiful he had ever seen.
Germany was in love.
"Mein Gott," said Germany. "What a beautiful stick! I shall have dinner with you tonight!"
That night Germany went to one of the most expensive and luxurious restaurants in Berlin. The waiter gave him an odd look as he took their orders, and rolled his eyes when Germany asked for a chair for his stick. But Germany didn't care. All that matter was him and his stick.
Afterwards, Germany and his stick took a walk through the streets.
"You need a name," said Germany.
The stick said nothing.
"How about I call you Herr Stick?"
Germany swore that he saw parts of the wood form into a smile.
"Uhh, West, are you okay?" asked Prussia.
Germany walked out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist and Herr Stick in his arms.
"I'm Fine, bruder
HetaOffice: Chapter 1HetaOffice
The first day is always the hardest
Toris sighed, as he pulled into the parking lot of his new job, some company called Herozone Paper Company. From what he gained from the interview, his new boss seemed to be obsessed with superheroes and stuff like that. Still, Toris wondered who would take a company with that name seriously.
He went through the front door of the building and entered the elevator, holding the door open for a pretty young woman with platinum blond hair.
"Hello!" he said brightly. "Which floor?"
"Fourth," she said flatly.
"Oh, you work for Herozone too?" he asked. "I'm the new salesman there. I'm Toris Lorinaitis."
The elevator dinged.
"Well, I'm looking forward to working with you, Natalia," he said.
She said nothing, but seemed to take hurried steps as she went inside. Almost as if she wanted to get away from him.
Toris took a deep breath and entered the office. Everyone already seemed to be working, phon
AN EPIC LOVE STORY PART 2Germany trudged back to his house and slammed the door to his bedroom. He collapsed onto the bed and cried his eyes out. His love, his one true, love, was broken into pieces. He clutched the broken half of Herr Stick and held him close to his chest. Oh, my sweet love thought Germany, not caring that splinters were starting to form on his hands.
"West?" asked Prussia, knocking on the door.
"GO AWAY!!" yelled Germany, throwing the pillow at the door.
"West, I want to talk "
"JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"
A few hours later, Germany walked out of the room, carrying a little box and wearing black. Inside the box were the remains of Herr Stick. He took the box out to the backyard and dug a hole for it. He carefully lowered the box inside the hole and said a few words about Herr Stick.
"Herr Stick you were my best friend, the love of my life. From now on my days will never be as bright as when you were in my life. I loved you I truly loved you and now you are gone fro
GermanyXNeko!Italy- A Chance For Neko Chapter 1
Ludwig was walking home after a hard days work. He was worn out and just wanted to get home quickly. But as he walked passed an alley, he heard something hit the wall and then a low groan. He glanced into the alley. He heard something moving, but he didn't know what it was, so he decided to call out.
"Hello? Is someone there?" He heard more movement and a trash can flipped over, then it got quiet. He hesitated, but then walked into the alley. He glanced around the dumpster and saw a huge wooden box. The lid was crooked, as if something got in there. With caution, he took a step toward the box and moved the lid off. As soon as he did, a boy sprang out and went into a corner, cowering in fear.
"Please don't hurt me! I-I wasn't going to stay long, I was going to leave in the morning!" Ludwig was confused at first but he walked over.
"I'm not going to hurt you." He stopped short when the boy looked at him, and his eyes widened. The boy was only wearing a long white shirt with long sleeves.
LudwigxFeli - Love Bites"Ludwig~?" Feliciano called out into the seemingly empty house, "Ludwig~ Where are you~?"
Deciding there was no danger in just looking around for a bit for the German, Feliciano stepped into the house and closed the door behind him. He took a few steps forward before he heard the shower running.
"Aha, so that's where he is!" Feliciano praised himself and skipped towards the source of the sound.
"LUDWIG~!" shouted Feliciano as he burst through the bathroom door.
Ludwig jumped a few feet in the air at the sudden intrusion. He mentally reprimanded himself for being startled, by an Italian no less. He sighed and turned off the shower before reaching for a towel, good thing he had already finished.
As Ludwig was leaning forward, Feliciano took the chance to wrap his arms around Ludwig's neck and pull him in.
"Huh...Wha...?" said Ludwig, trying to get more than one sentence out at once.
But before Ludwig could pull back, much less react.
101 Things - Germany101 things Germany is not allowed to do during World Meetings (or other times)
1. I'm not allowed to bring my brother to the meetings.
2. even if he begs.
3. even if he bribes me with beer. Or wurst.
4. I will not chain him to make him not follow me.
5. not that I ever wanted to bring him with me.
6. I will not sit next to South Italy.
7. I will not sit between South and North Italy.
8. I will not sit between South Italy and Spain.
9. I will not sit next to France.
10. I will NEVER AGAIN sit next to France.
11. I'm not allowed to use words like oven" or gas" next to Poland.
12. I should try not to talk to Poland at all.
13. I will not sit between Poland and Russia.
14. I will not make Poland sit between Russia and me.
15. I won't ask any of the nations what my brother has done back when I can't remember anything.
16. I will try to ignore the stories about my brother back then.
17. I will try to ignore Englands
037. Eyes"Your eyes are different than everyone else's, bruder."
Prussia cocked an eyebrow and looked down at his little brother, "What?" he asked, letting a smirk grace his lips.
Ludwig's face flashed briefly with doubt; maybe that wasn't a nice thing to say?
He was curious though; he'd never seen anyone else with his brother's eye color.
"Your eyes, bruder; I haven't seen anyone else that has red eyes," he shyly repeated.
"Is that a problem?" Prussia asked, kneeling down to his level.
Ludwig shook his head, "No, but I was wondering; why?" he asked.
Prussia grinned, "The awesome me is albino; it's a rather rare thing to be," he explained.
"Albino?" Ludwig asked; he'd never heard the term.
Nodding, Prussia sat down and his little brother sat in his lap, "What does it mean?" the boy continued.
"Have you ever noticed how pale I am?" Prussia asked.
"Yes, and the sun burns you really easily, bruder You aren't sick, are you?" Ludwig asked, starting to feel afraid. What would he do if Gilbert d
Hetalia School lifeHetalia! School life!
1.Your Homeroom teacher is: N. Italy
"Hello?" I ask, pushing open the door to homeroom. "Ciao~!" Mr. Vargas greeted me. "Ciao!" I say smiling. "Did you bring in your homework?" He asked eagerly. "Yep!" I say, pulling a slip of paper from my bag. "I hope you enjoy the pasta recipe!" I say. "Ve~! Thanks." Mr. Vargas is the best cooking teacher!
2. Your Literacy teacher is: America
I run to my next class, Mr. Jones is awesome! I love to try and match his energy levels! "Yo!" I say, entering the room. "'Sup!" Mr. Jones says. "How's my epicest student today?" That's one of the thing I like about him, he always asks, even if he shouldn't. Because he's a teacher and teachers don't do that normally. "More epic than YOU!!" I announce. He grins. "That's what I like to hear! Now we are reading "Twilight" today." My face falls a little. THAT was the only reason I disliked this class, Mr. Jones's taste in literature!! But the pros outweigh the cons right? RIGHT?!?
3. Your Math
Dark!Hetalia - I'll Kill Them - Part 1"They're all dead.... They're all dead.... They're all dead.... I'll kill them.... I'll kill them.... I'll kill them...." Lovino repeated over and over. He held a knife in his hand, stabbing it into the floor of his house. He had lost it by that time. He wanted to murder everyone. And he didn't know why. He just wanted to. It eventually had gotten to his head and was now planning to kill everyone. He had even made a list of who he was gonna kill in order.
"They won't be smiling any longer..." he said to himself, now rocking back and fourth. He held his knees to his chest, still clutching the knife in his hand. He began to smile as giggles escaped his lips. He was covered in his own blood. He had even gone as far as to hurt himself. After about 30 minutes of rocking back and fourth, he stood up and exited the hallway, and eventually his house. He was ready to attack, and his first victim was Francis and anyone around him.
Francis was hanging out with Alfred and Kiku at his house. T
My Awesome Lullaby"What are you doing ?" A French accented voice asked the albino haired nation, who seemed to be holding something.
Prussia smiled widely, a blonde child in his arms. "You guys, Meet the Holy Roman Empire."
Blue eyes stared upwards. He waved at the other two of the trio, then looked up at mysterious red eyes. "Gilbert " He said softly.
"You have a chico!" Spain said with a smile. "Hola, Holy Roman Empire!"
"Hello~" France said a bit, nodded.
"Hello " The kid, with intelligent blue eyes, looked at them both.
"He's real polite for a little chico."
"Oui, very smart looking. Where'd you get him from?"
"I'm awesome, I can pick out the strong ones."
"Strong ones ?" Spain asked lightly
"This, you guys, is the key to beating that Austria Bastard, and his superpowered wife."
"Eh?" Both the Spanish and the French nation asked. Even Holy Roman Empire looked up. "Austria and Hungary? That's where Italia is, I cannot do th-"
"HUSH!" Prussia said harshly, then softer "Hush, little
Tea Time Troubles*Read the description below, there is a picture/drawing from a fellow deviantART member that goes along with the short story.*
Tea time was something that little Arthur enjoyed immensely, but he was not allowed to have too much of the beverage because he was a little Chibi, and too much caffeine would mean Arthur not going to bed, frequent trips to the bathroom, and lastly, and to his father's horror, wetting the bed.
The little nation sat at the table in the dining room, swinging his feet, and sipping some cocoa from his cup, as this was what he was given by his father Alfred. The nation was off in another part of the mansion, but was most likely in his billiards room, and he usually spent many hours there.
Getting bored because he wanted to spend time with his father, and never having the time, little Arthur got down from his chair, and setting the mug of cocoa down, he ran down the corridor and his little face lit up as he heard the sounds of Alfred laughing at something. He
Hetalia: Zipper"...And so, I think we'll be able to rebuild Haiti's capital if we gather all of the duct tape in the world and..."
Germany tapped his pencil on the table in front of him. He wasn't even listening to America as he rambled on, not that it made much of a difference. Seventy-five percent of the things that came out of that nation's mouth was nonsense, anyway. Kind of like a certain someone...
The German turned his head to the Italian seated next to him. Veneziano didn't look like he was paying much attention, either, focused more on the page full of doodles in front of him. Most of them were of plates of pasta, some of little blobs that somewhat resembled him, Japan, and Germany. He was humming a happy little tune as he did so.
Jeez, the least he could do is pretend to pay attention like the rest of us, Germany thought. He did a quick look over at Italy's attire. And why is he wearing a hoodie here, of all places?! This isn't casual Friday, dummkopf! And sit up straight! You loo
APH - How to Annoy ItalyHow to Annoy Italy (Veneziano)
1. Take away his pasta until he cries.
2. Replace his pasta with Asian noodles and call it pasta.
3. Burn his pasta.
4. For dinner, give him Chef Boyardee.
5. Make him read Germany's magazines.
6. Pull his curl.
7. Actually, pull his curl slowly with a hot hair straightener.
8. Give him gelato soup (melted and warmed-up gelato) for dinner.
9. Take him to go see the Exorcist.
10. Take him to go see a marathon of slasher films on Halloween.
11. Take him to an anime convention wearing a maid outfit. Watch the hilarity ensue.
12. On March 17th, instead of celebrating his birthday, forget about it entirely and celebrate St. Patrick's Day instead.
13. Sign him up for boot camp for a whole summer.
14. Tell Romano that Veneziano loves him.
15. Make pizza with him. When it is about to be placed in the oven, dump all of the ingredients (tomato sauce, cheese, peppers, etc.) onto a slab of cardboard and bake it. Cut the cardboard into little triangles and serv
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