How to Annoy Italy (Veneziano)
1. Take away his pasta until he cries.
2. Replace his pasta with Asian noodles and call it pasta.
3. Burn his pasta.
4. For dinner, give him Chef Boyardee.
5. Make him read Germany's magazines.
6. Pull his curl.
7. Actually, pull his curl slowly with a hot hair straightener.
8. Give him gelato soup (melted and warmed-up gelato) for dinner.
9. Take him to go see the Exorcist.
10. Take him to go see a marathon of slasher films on Halloween.
11. Take him to an anime convention wearing a maid outfit. Watch the hilarity ensue.
12. On March 17th, instead of celebrating his birthday, forget about it entirely and celebrate St. Patrick's Day instead.
13. Sign him up for boot camp for a whole summer.
14. Tell Romano that Veneziano loves him.
15. Make pizza with him. When it is about to be placed in the oven, dump all of the ingredients (tomato sauce, cheese, peppers, etc.) onto a slab of cardboard and bake it. Cut the cardboard into little triangles and serve!